Weekly Weigh-In: It’s Time To Come Back

Oh Holy Jesus from Bridget Jones DiaryOh, holy Jesus… as Bridget Jones would say. Ok, so she said it because she showed up at the supposed “Tarts and Vicars” party in a bunny costume when it had been cancelled. I say it because I am about to start having to wear potato sacks! The clothes that were hanging off of me are now tight and uncomfortable, and I gave away all my “fat” clothes!

So, it’s time to come back. Or really, it’s time to make a COMEBACK!

Alexis {Diva on a Diet}'s Official Weigh In October 2, 2013

I haven’t seen the 140’s for the entirety of 2013. In fact, the last time I saw the 140’s was over a year ago in June 2012. And there it was staring me in the face last week, and then I proceeded to gain even more this week! I had gotten back down to within 2 lbs of my goal 8 weeks ago, and since then, I have gained 16.1 lbs… an average of 2 lbs a week! Just in the last month, I have averaged a 3.2 lb gain per week! I am a solid 18 lbs up from goal. My body fat percentage has skyrocketed into the 30% range, when it was in the mid-20%’s. I am a mere 4 lbs from being outside of my healthy weight range. What have I done?!?

This is what I did… I stopped working out completely. (Ok, I did one 5K, but it was miserable!) I have been sitting my lazy butt on the couch for weeks eating enormous amount of food and booze, of the worst things I could find… things I used to pig out on before like Chinese food, pizza, fast food, burgers, pasta with butter. I was trying to get it all in before I had to be good again.

Did I really think I was going to get away with this? No. Was it worth it? Well, I’ll tell ya, I’m damn pissed that I have buckle down and relearn my old eating and working out habits. Even though I am not that 200lb fat girl when I look in the mirror, I am in my mind. I feel that way, and I am acting that way. I have to find that skinny in control girl that I thought I had become. I know she’s in there somewhere! I don’t think it’s gonna be easy. But I’ve never said that I thought things were going to be any easier just because I hit goal.

And that’s another thing. My anniversary of reaching goal weight is about 6 weeks away. I’d have to lose 3 lbs each week to get back to goal by then! That makes me sad. I could push for it, but I know that slow and steady (and healthy) does win the race!

Now, let me take a step back, forgive myself, and look at the whole picture…

  1. People probably aren’t looking at me and thinking, “Man, is she fat!” (On a side note, I keep saying I feel so fat, which makes me laugh. Really, Alexis? So how did it feel to be over 200 pounds? It’s weird because I don’t really seem to remember it anymore! No wait. Really, I remember it feeling just as uncomfortable as I do now. I guess it’s all relative!)
  2. I am still in a healthy weight range, regardless of how close I am to being out of it.
  3. I haven’t gained it all back.
  4. I’ve done it once before, I can do it again.
  5. I didn’t have to be perfect the first time, and I don’t have to be this time either.

So here I am. I am back! Hoping that this is just one more tool to get me back on track! I miss you guys too! Hoping to have some time to catch up with everyone! How have your journey’s been going?

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  1. Ashley, 03 October, 2013

    YAY, YOU’RE BACK!! So proud of you, Alexis :) Over the last 8+ months I’ve lost 63.5 pounds and am currently 2.5 el-bees from Goal. One of my favorite “thin-spiration” quotes is: “It’s HARD being fit. It’s HARD being fat. Pick your hard.” YOU, blogging friend, have picked the right hard! Congratulations and good luck in the weeks/months ahead. You got this :)

  2. Caroline, 03 October, 2013

    I stumbled across your blog by accident, but a good accident. Your story you told yesterday about being lazy for the last 2 months and not paying attention to what you are eating, fits me.to.a.T! I did the color run back at the beginning of August, and I haven’t been back to the gym since, I keep telling myself well Monday I will restart and well now that has been 8 weeks. I sure am looking for motivation because WW works but hamburgers tastes so good! Good luck to you, I look forward to reading your success!! We can do it!

  3. DivaonaDiet, 04 October, 2013

    Congrats, Ashley! That is fantastic! I cannot wait for you to hit goal! It is such a great feeling! (A feeling I hope to get back again soon!) I think I am finally back in the right mindset! I know it’s not going to be easy, so thanks for the much needed support! :)

  4. DivaonaDiet, 04 October, 2013

    Haha, I love it!: “WW works but hamburgers tastes so good!” So true! I am also the queen of saying I’ll start Monday and it keeps not happening. People often ask me why all the sudden I finally stuck to WW, and I say something just finally clicked. It appears it has un-clicked for again for a while now, but I think it’s been switched back on. It’s not like all of the sudden have this amazing amount of willpower and discipline for a lifetime… it’s still a struggle. The only difference is that I know I can do it, so I don’t really have an excuse! And if I can do it, pretty much anyone can! So let’s get up and at ’em and do this!!! I’m glad you had the happy accident of stopping by! Thanks for taking the time to comment!

  5. Traci, 18 October, 2013

    I Love your honesty! We ALL convince ourselves that we are the only person who does this to ourself. I lose the same 15 pounds and then binge on junk food and alcohol and gain it all back. WW is the only way that has worked long term for mr? But I got cocky and thought” ahhh, I don’t need that. I got this all on my own”. We’ll that 15 pounds is back. I know exactly what you mean about clothes feeling too tight! Thank you so much for the inspiration and honesty. I’m back at WW too and can’t wait for us both to have successes to post:)

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