Uuuuuhhhhhhggggg. I’m pissed. I gained this week. I even said this week that I would be perfectly happy if I stayed right where I am, but clearly I will not be! I mean, not reaching a goal is so sad. Even if I gain some back, I’d like to at least get there. And when it is so close, it makes me want it that much more! I don’t want to move my goal up just so I can make it! I know a lot of people think I am skinny enough now, and I am crazy for wanting to lose that last, well, now 5 pounds, but damn it, I feel like if I have come this far, I can get off a measly 5 more pounds!
Yet, I shouldn’t be surprised by my gain this week. I didn’t track any food until yesterday. Mostly because, again this week, I had so many meals that I didn’t prepare for myself or that I didn’t measure. I feel like since I am just completely estimating so much of my food, I figure it’s way off anyway! Not to mention, I am just sort of sick of tracking! I mean, I have been pretty much a stickler when it comes to tracking since re-dedicating myself to the program in December. And while that has likely been a key to my success, I am just over it! After this week, I wonder if I have to track forever!?! I am not sure I can! But I am determined to get back on track at least this week.
But back to this past week… I also had some splurges Friday, Saturday and Sunday night. Which is fine and more than enough, but then for some reason I just felt like pigging out on Monday night, and I totally gave in. I am so pissed at myself for that. I guess it also doesn’t help that it’s that time of the month, and I was craving boatloads of sweet and salty foods! I’m gonna keep my fingers crossed that this week’s gain is just that time of the month bloat!
Now on to better things! I am choosing not focus on my “failure” today. I may have gained 1.6 pounds, but not without some successes (a.k.a. Non-Scale Victories) this week!
In A Bikini At the Pool
I’ve lived in my neighborhood for almost 9 years, and I’ve never been to my pool. I haven’t been to anyone else’s pool, for that matter. In fact, I haven’t been anywhere in which I had to put on a bathing suit in front of another person this whole time because I hated the way I looked. I wanted to get the confidence to go to the pool in my bikini this summer, and when I realized it was September, I figured better late than never! Now, I can still stand in front of the mirror and find a million flaws, but I bit the bullet, put on my bikini from my 20′s, and hit the pool with the new guy I am dating. Granted, there was only one other person there to see me, but no one freaked out! I am super excited that I did that, especially that I did it without feeling like I have to be perfect.
I actually finally got activity in 5 days this week! It’s been rough since fighting that everlasting sinus infection in August and then starting to date someone new. (I think I said this in in my last update, but it’s worth mentioning again. I know I’ve brought him up twice now in this post, but it’s still all very new, so you may, or may not, hear more about him later!)
Running 5 Miles
One of the most exciting things that happened was running my farthest mileage yesterday! I came home after work just hoping to at least struggle through 2.5 miles, while still hoping for at least 3, and then that mantra, “just keep going” was in my head. Then I remembered the Labor Day Virtual Run that Laura at Mommy Run Fast was hosting. I didn’t sign up for it because it was 5 miles. The most I had ever run was 4.5 miles and that was months ago and on a weekend when I sometimes try to do a little more mileage. This was a random Tuesday night, and remember, it was that time of the the month! Thoughts of me pigging out the night before may have also helped! So I just kept going, and thought, “I can do this,” and I can still enter that virtual race. And I did it! Weird thing was, I wasn’t totally winded when I was done, and I actually thought I could have kept going! I didn’t though, and I hope that wasn’t giving up. I didn’t because I have read a lot of blog posts about beginning runners doing too much too soon and getting hurt. I haven’t run over 3.5 miles in about a month, and I’ve barely been pulling out 3.1 miles here and there since then. My knees are not in the best of shape either. I was surprised too that my pace didn’t slow down that much either. It actually landed in the top 5 fastest for me on dailymile. It’s days like these that give me hope that I might actually make it to a half marathon someday. It also makes me wonder why I can barely pull out 2 miles some days. The body is funny like that I guess!
Weight Watchers Success Story Contest
I also entered the 2012 Weight Watchers Celebrate Success Contest! I’ve been wanting to submit my success story, but I kind of wanted to wait until I hit my goal. Then this big ‘ol contest came along where you can win a trip to NYC and be considered for a commercial, and I thought, let’s go ahead and do this! Of course now that a ton of people submitted, the chances of my success story even just being on the website is slim to none! (haha, pun was actually not intended!) That’s all I really want, but a trip and a commercial would be pretty darn cool! So send me good vibes, ya’ll!
Size 4 Pants
But wait, there’s more! So I needed to take an updated “after” picture. My friend who came over for dinner on Friday insisted that I must be a size 4, so I dug out my old size 4 pants from back in my 20′s that were still too tight just last month. Umm, check it out… I’m wearing those pants in my latest “after” pic! Seems strange because when I was this weight back in my 20′s, I actually couldn’t fit in these pants anymore. I definitely was not in shape back then! And the good news is that I can still fit in these pants after the 1.6 pound gain. hahaha. My mom also jokes that it is quite possibly the worst “before” picture of me ever because I didn’t look that bad before, but hey, I want to make this transformation look amazing, right?!? Oh, and it says I’m 128, because it was on Saturday when I took this picture, so hopefully I will get back there next week and make this pic legit again!
Weight: 130.0 lbs
Change this week: +1.6 lbs
Total lost: -71.1 lbs
You can also check out my weight loss progress log
And if you’re wondering, it’s not actually week 39 on Weight Watchers, it’s just week 39 of giving weekly updates since re-committing myself to the program.