You thought I was gone forever, didn’t cha? Well, I am back… The diva is back! That’s right, and I mean it this time! I took a bit of a hiatus, I guess you could say, from counting points, eating right, walking, etc. I was still paying my monthly Weight Watchers fee the whole time too! I guess I was somehow hoping that would make me go back! I just couldn’t find my motivation mojo! Any motivation I found would keep failing me after a few days (sometimes hours!), so I decided to just take a breather and work on just trying to be ok with the size I am at for a bit. I mean, I started to think that maybe I won’t ever be smaller than this size again, and maybe I just have to be okay with that.
But really people, I am just NOT okay with the size I am! Not just because of the way I look, but because I actually have health problems that can be affected by or have actually been caused by my not being in a “healthy” weight range! Acid Reflux Disease, High Blood Pressure, and High Cholesterol in your early 30’s are just not cool! And if you have stopped by here before, you would know that I haven’t felt like I have been giving it even close to 100%.
Ah, but truth be told, I also really miss my old skinny body! I miss how good it felt to go try on new clothes and go out and look hot! I miss being able to show my stomach without massive embarrassment. I haven’t worn a bathing suit in public in at least 5 years, probably more. I have somehow taken my diva self and settled down into lazy old maid spinsterhood without even knowing it! Ok, well, maybe I know it, but I think it’s finally gotten to me. I have vowed to get back on track after two months of doing nothing and who knows how many pounds of weight gain!
Yeah, I tortured myself a few times here and there during my “non-dieting” phase by weighing myself, which is why I am positive there has been some weight gain. And being the klutz that I am, I fell and sprained my knee last week, so I have basically been immobile and eating for a week! My knee still has some healing to do, so doing any actual activity is out of the question for a while. But I didn’t want to let that be yet another excuse for not getting down to business. I am going back to Weight Watchers to get the “official” weigh in tomorrow!
So there ya have it. I am back in the game. I am a stubborn girl, and I am trying to parlay that into this whole getting healthy thing! I know how demanding I can be, and I need to just turn that into vehemence for being healthy!
Oh, and I am sorry if I let you down by not telling you about cool new recipes and diet foods and funny stories! Hope you can forgive me!